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Archive for February, 2009

I’m not even for sure how to pick back up with my blog, it’s been so long. I never meant to take such a hiatus in writing, but I suppose all writers have their moments when nothing comes. Of course, mine started out due to a lack of time and has slowly progressed into not having anything meaningful to say. At least it feels that way.

Yesterday was my birthday. It dawned on me that I am 32 now. Not, that I had forgotten. I simply had this weird moment where it feels as if being a child myself was ages ago. I can’t fathom that I have been on this earth that long. Yet, I know that’s only a glimmer to a true lifetime. And then I think to myself-  was it really ages ago? I catch myself sometimes, when I watch Baby G mastering a task or encountering something for the first time, remembering my own reactions or thoughts as a child. I’m not for sure exactly how to explain it. I guess that’s why there’s that saying that some parents chose to live through their children again. Anyway, it’s in these moments that I realize that time is really relative in the scheme of things, but us humans just have to go and find a way to measure it and drive ourselves crazy worrying about whether we have enough of it or we’ve used time efficently enough. Ba-hum-bug. I am simply not a fan of time.

We’ve had a whole mess of things happen in the last few months…Baby G landed the nasty fever blister virus through an encounter with the bug. Neither Bryan or I get them- so it’s disappointing that his little system can’t fight it off.  Which is rather crazy, considering somewhere around 80% of the population carries the virus, but only a select few are unlucky enough to fall prey to its wrath. Poor sweet guy. Unfortunately, this bug did a number on him- as it ended up around his eye (no thanks to the stand in doctor) and it was the worst I have ever seen our little man. We have to travel to Charleston next Friday to make sure it hasn’t gotten into his eye, which we are pretty confident it hasn’t- but one cannot be safe enough. His regular pediatrician has been a life saver and helped get him better within a week.

Because of this, he hasn’t had his checkup yet and this Friday he gets his 9/10 month shots and all his growth stats. Our little man is growing like a weed, minus his cold and losing some weight; it will be nice to see where he’s at.

He has also progressed to a whole plethora of new foods and has started refusing baby food or anything that doesn’t allow him a chance to ‘chew’.

On an even bigger note, we are now on month ten of breastfeeding!! I am so positively happy that we have made it this far- but I am not looking forward to weaning him on so many different levels.

He’s also ‘vrooming’ his toy truck around that his Mom-mom gave him and loves to sit in his playroom by himself looking at books. We are pretty sure he might stand by himself pretty soon, too.

So in retrospect, where has the time gone? All I hope is that I’m capturing enough of his babyhood before he becomes that toddler he’s growing so fast into. Don’t get me wrong, I love this adventurous and brave little boy he is becoming, but know at the same time how very much I am going to miss my baby.

It’s funny, I feel as if I am playing tug of war with myself all the time…trying to get just the ‘right’ amount of time (there’s that dreaded idea again) with my little man and then trying the find just the right balance for the rest of my life somewhere precarelessly in there, too. Yet, funny thing is- I keep thinking if I’m not careful…none of it will matter and it will be gone before I can even blink an eye. So, I try to say a prayer every night that I will cherish every.single.little.moment no matter how small or exhausting they sometimes can be.

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